Tuesday, September 08, 2009

The Vampire finally got his way !


The friendly Facebook friend ( I thought ), the good Doc ,,, Bones T, finally had his evil way with me !
For some years now, on & off, for I very rarely visit his dungeon, my GP has been asking me to take these MOT bloods as he calls them !
Finally last week I stupidly went to see him to find out what his diet secret was .,., He's a big lad and had reputedly lost over 3-stones in a month or so, in fact 50 lbs in 5 weeks ,, WOW !
I was impressed and wanted to lose a bit myself ( again ) so by invitation I went to find out his secret. Silly, silly move Scudder ! This daft boy is on a 500 calories a day, 4-cup-a-soups ( light variety ! ) and water .,., No solid food whatsoever .,., No nothing else at all .,., Eh, and him a doctor too ??
Well I said, ta very much, but you can count me out of that one ! I'll get back to talking to old Dr. Atkins, a much safer bet.
That did it ,,, Oh well he says, at your age we should just check your bloods before you go back on the diet ,, what was your last Cholesterol reading ??
Eh,,, never had it checked in my life I'm afraid, says I .,., I just follow my old Ma's advice and go to work on an egg ,, with toast and lots of butter of course !
We'll get the nurse to do your MOT next week he says .,., just come in before you hit the golf course, it'll take a mere 10-minutes .,.,.
What could I do ? I suppose I've put this MOT off long enough and I'm not getting any younger !
So, today I got introduced to Janice, who took my height, ( a little on the short side at 5'-10" for my weight ! ) weight, ( definitely now on the heavy side again at just under 16-stone ! Oops, how did that happen ) blood pressure ( I don't remember the numbers but it was fine )
All the while talking she filled about 5 of these little vials with my bloods .,., hey that's nearly an arm full as old Tony would have said !!
They're now going off to, God knows where, to check the function of my liver, kidneys, prostate, diabetes and on & on ,,, so 10-days from now I should know if I've got much longer for this world or if I should dig out that Will !!

1 comment:

Alistair said...

Hullo Mr. Scudder,

I had mine done a couple of weeks ago now and have had the results back at 5.7 cholestorol. As the average is 5.5 I thought that was ok, but no, I have to go on a diet, use that cholestorol reducing marge and drink and get down to below 5. And I've got to give anothet blood sample after fasting for 12 hours as eating can affect it.
Watch out me old son. Now they've got their hooks in you you may never get away.

And have you done the bowel screening thingy too........eeuchh!!!

Gettin old is rubbish......